Can a Russian woman age 30 be truly interested in a man of 70 years?

by Peter
(Albany, NY, USA)

I met this woman on a sex webcam site. I began in the "private" sessions only to talk. She initially refused to give out any personal information, but eventually gave me her address, phone number, and email.

She said she was only working the site to make money to pay off her parents' debt. She soon quit the site, moved to Moscow to be with family and we have continued to talk twice a week on SKYPE. She has never asked for money, is reluctant to apply for any visa, even fiancee. She is working a legitimate job in Moscow. She has accepted $100 and $200 that I volunteered to help her transition off the sex site.

She is not married and has no children. She is open about her friends, family and work.

She says she "Likes me very, very much" and I tell her I love her which I do. I am a retired physician. She says I do not look my age and likes my personality.

I do not think she is scamming me, she asks for nothing except to talk and see me on SKYPE. She does think her legitimate job in Moscow will make it easier to get a visa.

My real question is: Do I continue to court her and hope she will agree to meet and someday marry, or am I dreaming?


Bob's Answer:

Let me start with my answer to your "real question" first, then expand on the details later.

You should NOT continue to court her and HOPE she will agree to meet and marry. But that doesn't mean it's over. If you're serious about it, why don't you visit her in Russia? The odds are that she won't ever get a visa to come to the U.S. on her own.

And one doesn't "court" and "hope she will agree to meet". If you're interested and want it to happen, you make it happen -- at least as far as it depends on you. And making a trip to see her seems like an obvious and necessary step toward that end.

Now to the question asked in the subject line: Can a Russian woman age 30 be truly interested in a man of 70 years? It would be unusual, but not impossible. Women in professions like her former job often see a darker side of life and cling to a strong, decent person.

OR, she could be scamming. I often hear "she asks for nothing" and "she hasn't asked for money" as evidence of authenticity. But when she throws in the story that she works some seedy job to pay off her parents' debt, THAT IS pretty much a request for money! And recognize it or not, you knew that's what it meant, which is why you sent money.

BUT ON THE OTHER HAND, it would be unusual for a girl on a sex-talk site where you pay-per-talk (and probably a fair amount of $$$ over time) to just give you her direct contact information where you can communicate free. I would guess that she earned pretty good money there.

So I can't really tell for sure what's happening here.

But I do know that sitting and hoping isn't very likely to succeed in anything. If this is to be "real", it must be face-to-face. That's really fairly non-negotiable. So tell her you would like to visit her in May and spend a week there. Her reaction could tell you a lot.