Ukraine vs other Former Soviet Union locations

by Robert
(Maryland, USA)

Hello... I have been successful at learning the hard-way, and I give Bob a very big "Thumbs-up" on his advice. As I read his site, I could be writing each article myself!

My experience would call for caution with Ukrainian Women vs Russian Women. I was married to a woman who had most relatives in Poltava, and the marriage ended after 7 years, as I think Luba (not her real name) could not properly evaluate our compatibility when I came to her country. She had a 7 y/o son, and had been surviving as the mistress of Gov official. When I offered her a life in a family unit, offered to be a father to her son, she took my offer even she had second thoughts about our compatibility.

Don't get me wrong... back up the calendar 8 years, and I would marry her again! I am still connected to my step-son more than my own son!

As it happened, after 7 years she had built a life in the US, became very successful in sales, Obtained her US Passport, and decided to strike-out looking for other relationship options by filing for divorce. Remember Bob's comments about how much attention an attractive woman can have in the US! She just finally came to terms with the fact that we were not as emotionally compatible as she wanted.

Fast forward to today, I went back to the "system" of Writing many until it was narrowed to visit one. Within 3 months, I was in Russia meeting my current wife. The differences were quite obvious, in that my wife understood what she was looking for, and was willing to WAIT until she found it. She explained that she understood the Ukraine mentality, and dismissed my recent divorce as an unfortunate situation typical for Ukrainian women (they do not know what they want). She summed up the cultural difference in this story: There is this orchard owner, just making his final harvest before fall frost. His cart is overflowing, as he makes his way to market 300 km away. There is no one with money to purchase his crop, so he goes to another villiage, and again no buyers. There are many that are hungry, and a child asks for one apple. The reply is that these are all "his" apples, and if there is no one to buy them, he will take a bite out of each one before he would help anyone else.

She told this story from experience, as her brother-in-law was a Ukrainian dead-beat.

The ex was 29 when we met, my current wife was 33... the ex had paid a bribe to complete University, the current wife has 2 degrees, the ex has parents that do not have University education, my wife has parents that are retired University Professors. My ex is jealous I found her replacement so fast, my wife had been looking 2 years (3 failed on-line relationships) to find me.

Conclusion: From My experience, you need to be more selective with Ukrainian women, as they typically do not know what they want, other than to leave Ukraine (see the news about Lugansk / Donestk conflict)


Bob's Comments:

Thanks for the compliments!

But I really feel compelled to jump in and add a slightly different angle. My ex-wife was Russian, and from her I do know how they view Ukrainians. Many Russians feel very "superior" to Ukrainians. And they're pretty black and white about it.

But I've been to both Russia and Ukraine (more often to Ukraine), and have met far more Ukrainians than Russians, and while there are, of course, those so desperate to get out of their country that they will to do anything, that's certainly not the majority, AND it certainly exists in Russia too.

And there are certainly Russian women who would buy a degree or be the mistress of a government official. ACTUALLY, come to think of it, one of my Russian ex's best friends was just such a mistress!

As far as women "not knowing what they want", most don't! In the movie "P.S. I love you" there is a cute scene that answers the question
What women want (click that link to see the clip).