Unsolicted EMail and wants to pay for half the airfare?

by Dirk
(Seattle, WSH, USA)

Over 2 months I have communicated romantically with this fine lady from St Petersburg, Russia, who first approached me by email. I don't know how she got my email address. After only 2 months, probably 30 lengthy and very intense emails and lengthy WhatsApp conversations, she wants less messaging but personal contact now.

I want the same as we are both in love. She says she is strongly in love with me and cannot wait to see me any longer. She wants to meet me at my home in the USA before me going to meet her in Russia. She refuses my offer to see her first in Russia.

She has agreed to pay for half the airfare including cost of tourist visa and passport processing. She wants me to send me the money directly to her bank account or PayPal, for which she has given me all the transfer details. Is this too good to be true and should I find a polite way to refuse to send the money to her bank account? Suspiciously a scam.

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RE: Unsolicted EMail and wants to pay for half the airfare?
by: Bob (Site Owner)

No offense, but you REALLY need to familiarize yourself with Russian Dating Scams. Read that, and click on every link on that page, especially Click HERE to read about how to avoid email scams.

She contacted you first... Were you even on a dating site? Did you ASK her how she got your email address? If not, why not? It's a perfectly logical, reasonable question. And don't accept "I don't remember", or "I got it from a website", or "I got it from an agency".

But DUDE, she's "in love" after just writing? You don't know how she got your email address? She writes you out of the blue? She wants to visit the U.S. first? She rejects you visiting her first? She wants you to SEND MONEY?

This is 100% scam. There's nothing real here. If you refuse to go along with all the details of her plan, she's going to manipulate you. "I thought you were a real man", "You're like all the other men", etc.

If you send money she isn't going to come... She can't! I'd bet my bottom dollar she doesn't have (and can't get) a tourist visa to visit the U.S. But, if you send money, she'll discover some other problem that requires money... "OH, I discovered that I need a visa, and that costs $400", or "Russian law requires that I leave deposit money in order to leave the country in order to ensure our return", or other crap like that. And no matter how many times you pay, there will always be another problem.

If you absolutely need to persist in this, why not offer to book and pay for her flight yourself? This should prove a LOT. Think about it, she only asked you to pay HALF, but you can offer to pay for the whole thing. That should be a better deal for her, right? But she won't go for it.

She's going to say something like "But Russian law requires us to buy our own flights" or some crazy thing like that.

Alternatively, just tell her that you will visit her in St. Petersburg, and if that isn't acceptable then you no longer wish to communicate.

Sorry, but this one is a no-go.

I tend to agree
by: Dirk

I tend to agree with Bob's comments. It is a scam. If it to good to be true, it probably is. She makes an awfully convincing story. I will offer to pay her total flight and see what she says, if nothing else, for curiosity to see what she comes back with. Thanks Bob, for the feedback and your educated opinions. Dirk.

RE: I tend to agree
by: Bob (Site Owner)

You're welcome!

BTW, I wouldn't actually buy that ticket, just offer :) 99% chance that she'll show her true colors just with the offer, but she could still easily scam you by pulling the usual tricks... "Oh, I need $400 for a visa", "I need $900 to leave as a deposit" (or "exit fee"), etc.

Its a scam so sorry but yes a scam
by: Mark

Its a scam so sorry but yes a scam. If you pay for anything you'll get excuses that sound realistic, or dropped like a bad habit.

Sorry for being blunt but that's what this is for. We help each other. Honestly, you can call me on phone if you want an explanation on finer points but.

1. Don't send money.
2. Unless you start the initial communication it's always a SCAM. Dude.

Hoping to help you, Mark B.

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